Around the Traps - A Mixed Bag of Goodness

Three weeks to go people before our retreat! ....and one lovely surprise that I haven't yet shared is that the lovely Alichia from Hearth Collective is coming along to do a short "extra" Saturday afternoon workshop about spoon carving. I'm so excited about this one - I love carved spoons! If you haven't seen her beautiful work then please pop over to her site to have a look. 

Next up - because I know that many of you reading can't actually attend the retreat, I've come up with a (genius) plan to spread a little of the retreat joy while it's on! I'm going to have an ace giveaway that will involve a pack of goodies from some of our lovely and super generous supporters (who you can see listed in the sidebar over there ---------> ) so keep your ears open. I'll announce how to enter on this here blog, instagram, Facebook and even Twitter so you will hear about it but I think I'll do it over the weekend of the retreat. It seems fitting.

This last few weeks is such a fun time of year for me as this is when we get to put the final touches on the event. The bits that make it really special. And the boxes have started arriving with lovely things for your retreat gift. I'm can't wait to share them with you on the weekend.... not long now! 

Another lovely thing appearing on the interweb this week is that Karen's gorgeous new project bag is for sale. I missed out on snavelling one of them from Fringe so popped on over to Purl as fast as my little fingers could click. You all know I am mainly and usually about less stuff (she says while talking about gifts and giveaways) but I'm also for the special and well-thoughtout, ethical and clever. These bags are that - they are so beautiful and practical and did I mention beautiful. I haven't decided whether this spend it needs to be included in my Stash Less tally. Your thoughts? It's not technically stash. It's a bag. Do I get off on a technicality?

And talking about Stash Less - I've got a couple of posts coming up for you. I had a little break. Not from Stashing Less but from writing about it. Not sure why - I think I was just forming some more thoughts. Anyway, thoughts are formed and I even did a bit of research about them. And then Elizabeth's question at the end of the (amazing) comments on the Craft In The Middle Of Motherhood has sparked another post - I'm pretty sure I have an answer for her. 

Felicia x

Craft in the middle of motherhood

Motherhood. I've been meaning to write this post for a long time*. But each time I start I end up feeling like the topic is too big, I've too much to say, and I'm too tired. One thought was that another title for this post could be "Craft as a Parental Survival Technique" because in the early years of motherhood, craft really did save me. I'm worried that sounds a little dramatic, but I feel that many of you will know exactly what I mean. You do, don't you?

I had a short email exchange with a friend today about parenting toddlers and tears. The tears of the grownup, not the kid, you understand. She was nearly there today and I've been there, many many times. In fact I was there only a few short weeks ago. Sending myself to my room because I just wasn't coping with the demands of three small people at bedtime in the midst of headaches, mice plagues, renovations, absent partners and a freezing cold winter. Too much sibling fighting. Too much he said, she said. Too much.

To cope, during those few days of overwhelm, I found myself knitting like woman possessed. Knitting as a way to find a little headspace. Knitting as a way to find a little calm. Knitting as a way to be a better parent. The parent I want to be. One that is thoughtful and kind and present and wise. I'm nearly 10 years into parenting now, and I know that without craft, there is no chance I would even come close to being that parent. Craft means that somedays I get there.

I've often wondered whether there really are people in the world that fully embrace parenting with their whole hearts, never needing their own space or craving their own time. Or whether that is purely a myth, and those that appear that way, merely look that way from the outside in. Maybe there are? And if they are in that space - the one where they are just present and truly happy - then I envy their contentment. I'm there sometimes but often I find myself craving space, adventure, freedom.

Yes, parenting was a choice that I chose. I chose to have children and I honestly love it. Wholeheartedly. They are truly magic and beyond a doubt it is the most amazing adventure I've ever been on. But that said, I don't think I really understood the choice I was making when we decided to have a baby. I didn't understand just how much of yourself gets consumed, not just by the kids, but by the household duties that come along with it. I used to say to my partner that I had agreed to become a mother but not a housewife. And yet there is a certain inevitability to the daily slog. I do housework because I love my kids and I want to create a home for them that feels warm and cosy. I try really hard to be present. I try really hard often. And yet housework has never been something I've been able to fully embrace even when I try really hard. I resent it. I've tried following the Buddism for Mothers idea about moving meditation and non judgement. "It's only a broom. It's only sweeping". I've tried not judging the activity with the dialogue of  "this is so f&%*ing boring. How is this my life?" I know those thoughts are ungrateful. I know how blessed I am to have three healthy happy kids and a partner and a cosy home and yet sometimes it feels all consuming. How is it possible that that there is that much housework? How is it possible that there is no time? How is it possible that I have no time to do the things I want to do? The things that give me joy and fill me up?

Kids, by their very nature, crave attention. I don't see them as attention seeking as such. They are however, totally wrapped up in their view of the world and it's excitement and want to share it with the people they love best. And I'm lucky enough to be that person. 

I love hearing about their inner lives. About the special headband, and the steps involved in doing a handstand, and how they found a gecko, and how their best friend said that she was getting a horse for her backyard.... 

But there is a but. And the but is that there is often no headspace at all. Sometimes it feels like if they see that I'm actually having a thought, any kind of thought that doesn't involve them, then they feel honour bound to bring me back with a "mama, mama, Mama, MAMA MAAAAMA!!!". Till I am back. Right there with them. 

As they have gotten older the intensity of parenting is easing up a little, and I know it will one day end for good, which truly devastates me. But being in it, being in the thick of it, somedays I just want to run for the hills. 

My friend asked me today whether I had read The Divided Heart: Motherhood and Creativity by Rachel Power. I forgot to reply as I was dealing with ear infections and renovations, but the answer was a big loud YES! I'm so grateful to that book. That book talks about the struggle. The struggle to mother well but also to retain a sense of self. I read it when my kids were young and it was such a blessing to me. I heard other women talk about their struggle with the same thing. And it is a struggle. 

This simple line from the book sums it up the best for me. 

“I regularly used to accuse my mum of being vague, ... which I feel very bad about now, because I realise she was just trying to maintain an inner life”

— Jocelyn Moorhouse, Filmaker, The Divided Heart

An Inner Life! I want one of those.

And then there was this

“My son, and later my daughter too, demanded total fidelity to their need for a mother who was present, alert to their small achievements, sensitive to their coded messages. The moment I sat down to read or to pen a few lines, their antennae seemed to twig that my energy had turned inward, and I was ambushed by demands. ”

— Rachel Power, Author of The Divided Heart

There wasn't (isn't) time. There wasn't (isn't) space. And that is why domestic textile-based handcraft became my lifeline. It was portable. I was able to do it while they were there. I didn't need a special setup. It could blend into our life. Over the years it's become so much a part of our lives, they seem to see it as if I'm doing housework, and so don't feel like I've left them when I'm doing it. 

Craft gave me something of my own, even in the midst of kids and chaos and sickness and school and moving and travel. It gave me a visible product at the end of a day where I felt that I had achieved nothing but even more chaos. The click-clack provided a rhythm which matched the beat of my heart, calming me down, grounding me in precisely the right way. It gave me a way to be present when all I could think about was freedom. It gave me 3% of my me-ness even when I was reading a story I didn't like, to three small people who were simultaneously doing my hair, sitting on my back and arguing over whose turn it was to sit next to me. And it turns out that 3% is often enough. 

It gave me something that was mine, just mine. Space. A moment. A thought. An idea. A product. A process. A feeling. A spark. Joy. Calm. Grounding. 

It enabled me to be in it even on days when I didn't want to be there. It meant that within the new life (I had chosen) there was still a part of me that was the me of before. The core of me. 

After writing this down I take back what I said at the start. I'm not worried about it sounding dramatic. I'm almost worried that I won't have conveyed just how meaningful craft has been to me. And even though the intensity of small baby-hood has passed, on days like the one a few weeks ago, it is as relevant and meaningful and necessary as ever. 

I'd love to hear your stories. Was this your experience?

And if you are a creative woman with kids looking for a fantabulous life-changing and afirming read then please look at Motherhood and Creativity: The Divided Heart. I go back to it time and again when I need a reminder that I'm not alone.

Felicia x

*The date that this post was originally created, according to my web software, was way back in May of 2014. 

PS. My apologies that I haven't been as present as I would normally be in this space. That life/parenting/family/running-a-retreat thing has been kicking my arse just a little bit. I'm reading your comments as always just not able to reply like I normally would.... Today though - I'm totally here! x

Simple Sewing 101 - Part 5 - Alterations #2

So the camera is in the shop at the moment (It crazily takes nearly two months!) and the pictures aren't the best. But as I've been trying to post this for ages then I'm just going with what I have. Please note that one of the photos actually totally misrepresents what you need to do - so please read the captions. Hopefully the caption clarifies it, but ask questions if I've confused you!  What a start to a post hey...

This post is part of our Simple Sewing series and contains my two most commonly used alterations. Put very simply both these adjustments add/take fabric away at the point it needs to be added/removed without really adjusting the shape of the garment. Minor surgery to achieve a better fit. They are in the spirit of simple sewing, in that they are a simple fix, to a common problem, that works, that isn't fiddly, that you can refine over time, as your skills develop. Gotta love a comma.

I use these adjustments on the Wiksten Tank, the Grainline Scout and tunics like the dress version of the Wiksten Tank and the Wiksten Tova. 

My two most common alterations

Bottom adjustment. 

Truthfully this is known as the arse-expansion technique* and it is super simple. It is useful for frocks such as the Wiksten Tank or the Tova (which are made for hipless people?) but it is also exactly the same technique I used on my woven Hemlock to give it the swing in the hem.  

1. Measure from your shoulder down to your widest point (your widest hip point) - we will call it X. On the pattern, measure from your shoulder line to the hip length X and mark your pattern. 

2. Measure your hips and add the amount of ease you need in order for the frock to not stick to your bum and hips - in my case it is about 8 inches. I did this by measuring a tunic I liked in my wardrobe.

3. Measure the width of the pattern at the hip point on both the front and the back. Add them together before taking away four times the seam allowance - normally this is something like 2" (  4 x 0.5").

4. Work out the difference between the width I like (Measured in point 2.) and the pattern width (Measured in point 3.) - and divide it by 4. For me it is about 6" so 6/4 = 1.5" that I need to add. 

5. Cut out the shoulder and armhole of the pattern as it is. Stop cutting at the bottom of the armhole. Don't cut out the sides or hem.

Cut out the neckline and then the armhole. Stop cutting at the "cut out to here" point. This pattern drawing is the representation of the front of a tank like the Wiksten Tank. 

6. Holding the armhole point of the pattern in place on top of the fabric, pivot the hemline of the pattern away from the fold line of fabric. Keep tilting at the hip level until the pattern piece is the correct distance away from the fold - the distance you determined in point 4. In my example I pivot to leave 1.5" between the fold and the pattern piece. Note. The photo below shows the wrong pivot point. 

This PICTURE IS WRONG but all I have to show what I mean. You actually hold the point at the armhole called "cut out to here" in place and tilt from there. I will update the photo soon. The aim is to have the 1/4 of the width of your desired hip (plus your seam allowances) from the edge of the fabric at the hip point (shown here by the line with the arrows at the end). 

6. Repeat for the back! You might need to fiddle a bit with this if the front and the back are very different in their measurements. ie. Not divide exactly by four but add 1" to the front and 2" to the back.... I'm hoping this makes sense.

Back adjustment

This is very similar to the bottom adjustment except that it deals with a situation where the back of a top (like the Scout or the Wiksten Tank from the Sewing 101 post) is too wide or alternatively too tight. 

This happens to me on the Wiksten Tank. The sizing is such that on me, if it fits across the boob then the back is too wide. By making this a few times I had a couple of muslins. I could see that I had about 1.5 inches of fabric more than I needed. I did this by pinching it out in the back of my neck while I had it on. 

A word of warning: You need to trial this and probably start small. For the tank shown i the photo at the start of the post I went too far with the back adjustment. It then didn't cover my bra strap and pulled in around the shoulders. 

Fixing it simply involves a single step.

1. Tilt the pattern of the back of the neck so that the pattern sits about 3/4 of an inch over the fold. It is really simple. The only thing you need to ensure is that although you have tilted the pattern piece that you cut the neckline at 90 degrees to the fabric for an inch or two before you start cutting to the edge of the pattern. You may need to fiddle with this a little - make a (wearable) muslin.

Shows the pattern sitting on the fabric as you would normally cut it. Don't!!

Tilt so that the pattern sits over the crease. Tilt from the bottom point where the hem of the back meets the fold of the fabric. Smaller alterations are better to start with as you will change the shape of the garment. Make sure you cut the fabric at the neckline at 90 degrees from the fold to ensure you don't get a little V. 

You can also use the same trick to add a little more fabric - just tilt the pattern in the other direction! 

As always - my little disclaimer - this is Simple Sewing 101 and not proper dressmaking. 

Fel

*In the circles I run in.

What is art?

So late last year I went to a bar with Anna, drank a few glasses of pinot and got up on my soapbox (barstool?) about the lack of credibility and respect given to craft - and I wrote a post about it. Craft as the ugly stepsister. And as is often the case with blogging, the really good stuff happened in the comments section of that post. The comments gave me so much to think about that I've been thinking/chatting about it ever since. And although that post wasn't really a craft v's art post I'm really curious about where the line is. What makes craft craft and art art? And then why is one deemed more XYZ than the other?

One comment I especially loved was Siri's paraphrasing of her sister Mim's thoughts.

“Art and craft are different. She suggests art is harder because it is about creating new frameworks that challenge the way we perceive and think about things. She likes craft because it is gentler and there isn’t this pressure on it.

She also suggested that whether people see craft as equal to art is a different issue.”

— Siri giving the gist of Mim's thoughts. Both smart women. x

I totally agree with Mim. I think that the line between art and craft is very different to whether people see craft as equally deserving of their respect. The probably both deserve their own posts but for now I've found something that shifted the whole debate to another plane.

I've been moving on from my beloved podcasts this week, and upping the ante on my "ideas consumption", by listening to an audiobook by Seth Godin called the Icarus Deception. Chapter 3 talked about what art was - in Seth's opinion it isn't necessarily a painter.

“Oscar Wilde wrote that art is new, complex and vital. Art isn’t something made by artists. Artists are people who make art. Art is not a gene or a specific talent. Art is an attitude, culturally driven and available to anyone who chooses to adopt it. Art isn’t something sold in a gallery or performed on a stage. Art is the unique work of a human being, work that touches another.

Most painters, it turns out, aren’t artists at all — they are safety-seeking copycats. Seizing new ground, making connections between people or ideas, working without a map — these are works of art, and if you do them, you are an artist, regardless of whether you wear a smock, use a computer, or work with others all day long.”

— Seth Godin "The Icarus Deception"

Seth says many more things about art (in this book and others) which I found useful and which have transformed my thinking to some degree. I'll leave you with a couple more but I would love to hear what you think and whether this resonates for you.

“Committing to do work that is personal, that akes guts and that has the potential to change everything. Art is the act of a human being doing generous work, creating something for the first time, touching another person. ......

Art is frightening. Art isn’t pretty. Art isn’t painting. Art isn’t something you hang on the wall. Art is what we do when we are truly alive. If you have already decided you are not an artist it is worth considering why you made that decision and what it might take to un-make it. If you have announced that you have no talent in anything then you are hiding.

Art might scare you. Art might bust you but art is who we are, and what we do and what we need.

An artist is someone who uses bravery, insight, creativity and boldness to challenge the status quo. And an artist takes it, all of it, the work, the process, the feedback from those we seek to connect with personally. Art isn’t a result, it is a journey.

The challenge of our time is to find a journey worthy of your heart and your soul.”

— Seth Godin "The Icarus Deception"

Weigh in lovely peeps! 

Felicia x

The True Cost

Today I want to talk about the documentary, The True Cost that was released earlier this year. I've finally just got around to watching it and I'm only three quarters of the way through. Now this may seem like an odd time to review it but that's just it. I've decided I don't really want to review it*. I want to simply suggest you watch it.

“Filmed in countries all over the world, from the brightest runways to the darkest slums, and featuring interviews with the world’s leading influencers including Stella McCartney, Livia Firth and Vandana Shiva, The True Cost is an unprecedented project that invites us on an eye opening journey around the world and into the lives of the many people and places behind our clothes. ”

— www.truecostmovie.com

Shivers is what it has given me. Shivers because there was things I just didn't know. Shivers even though I consider myself to be relatively well informed and thoughtful. So much I sort-of knew has been clarified, and then some. But what I'm loving about this doco is the big picture stuff. It covers it all, our behaviour as consumers, big business, fair trade, environmental impact of the growing and the waste, health, treatment of workers in the third world, and more. 

Just in case you aren't a fan of preachy docos, don't worry. This isn't one. They make it interesting and considering the massive scope of the film they do a good job of giving you a big picture overview.

I haven't seen the end yet so I'm not sure if they are able to wrap it up well, or if they offer solutions or ways forward. Even if they don't I'm not sure it matters. They give you a lot of information. Information that could be used to make different choices. I believe in personal responsibility. I believe personal action is powerful and the small changes we make add up. The only person's behaviour I can directly affect or change is my own. And this documentary was a great reminder of what I care about and what I want to change;  a personal call to arms. Renewing my desire to be thoughtful and considered in what I purchase, what I own, what I wear.

I still make mistakes in this and go the easy option; buying because it was quick and pretty and affordable. Just this week I did it when I purchased leggings for the girls without truly understanding the company I was purchasing from.  I know I can do better. 

“You change all consumers into activists, all consumers asking ethical questions, all consumers asking quite simple questions about where there clothes are from. All consumers saying I’m sorry, it’s not acceptable for someone to die in the course of a working day. We can’t just roll over and say yes have it, do what you like. It’s too important, it’s too significant an industry, it has too much impact and effect on millions of people worldwide and common resources. ”

— Lucy Siegle - The True Cost

One place that is particularly relevant here, where I know I can get better, is in my purchasing of fabric. As many of you know, over the last year I have been working on changing my purchasing  behaviour through my Stash Less project, and hopefully I've helped to raise some discussion at the same time. The aim of Stash Less is that I will purchase craft materials in a more thoughtful way and that I can change my behaviour one step at a time. One area I haven't really spent much time on yet is where my fabric comes from.

I know a little - for example in the picture at the top of the post I know that two of the fabrics are organic. But what about the rest. And then what about things I adore, like Liberty, ....or Nani Iro. I know nothing about where they are made, and how they are made, and I haven't asked. And that to me is the simplest small change I can make. I need to ask.... 

If you've seen it or go watch it because of this I would love to hear about what impacted you.

Felicia x

* A quick google search will lead you to many a reviewer by many a website or newspaper.